So Husband and I agreed that we wouldn’t tell anyone we were trying for a baby to avoid the pressure and constant questioning that would inevitably roll in as a consequence. And we didn’t at first.
But over the few months we have been trying, it just accidentally-on-purpose happened one way or another. Now I’m starting to question whether that was the right thing to do.
I told one of my closest friends before we were even trying as we were going through a bit of a timing nightmare and I needed someone to talk to. So she knows. No big deal.
Then a work friend got pregnant and it came up in conversation. So she knows. Okay, two people, that’s not too bad. Then another work friend confided in me her baby plans so I reciprocated. That makes the count 3. Then my ‘work Mum’ just guessed. 4. I wasn’t too bothered at this point though because they all helped me through my mini-meltdown last month so I am eternally grateful.
The number doesn’t stop there though. Husband recently went on holiday and his mates asked him. So he told them. That doubles the tally.
Then another friend asked me. So I told her. What are we on now? 9? And there are probably more. So basically, the let’s-not-tell-anyone plan has become the tell-anyone-that-asks plan. And I don’t know if this is okay. It’s not because I want to keep it a secret but because I feel like I can’t now control who finds out we are pregnant and when.
An example. Because of last month’s freakishly long period, ‘work Mum’ knows now when I am next due on (yes, she has calculated). Typically, this clashes with the day we are going out for cocktails. So if I’m not drinking, she’ll know and my actual Mum won’t even know yet! I’d hate for other people to know before my own parents. And if I do drink, I could unknowingly be pregnant which is also not ideal.
Hence why I’m having a mare.
Help please! Any advice?